I called my conjoined twin Jack up.
He was living the dream at the village of sweet smelling water.
I told him we were blessed by Cindy and Novi's holy milk.
'Sounds like a consecration to me,' he said, before getting back to business.
'That was just a test run for the main event.'
I knew what was following that.
Wan Mohammed was on the loose.
He had just bombed the shit out of some brothels in Johor Baru and was on the run.
He was last seen on a speedboat heading south.
'That's right,' said my brother,' he's probably laying very low in Bintan.'
That was my turf I said.
'That's why the CIA is happy with you, they keep on asking me where haven't you traveled.
Usually, only in the hot spots, I said.
'And that's why the CIA is very happy with you. They love the idea of a middle-aged Australian with bad teeth who dresses badly being their man in Asia.'
Jack knew how to turn it on when he knew there was a big payment at the other end of a mission.
When do you want us over there, I asked.
As soon as possible, said Jack, I could hear giggling in the background, I'm sure he was training up more assassins.
Then the line went dead.
I'd have to break the news to our team.
I'm sure they'd take it well, especially after I told them that there's a Pizza Hut on the island.
And I had an idea where the Malaysian scum bag was hiding.
He was living the dream at the village of sweet smelling water.
I told him we were blessed by Cindy and Novi's holy milk.
'Sounds like a consecration to me,' he said, before getting back to business.
'That was just a test run for the main event.'
I knew what was following that.
Wan Mohammed was on the loose.
He had just bombed the shit out of some brothels in Johor Baru and was on the run.
He was last seen on a speedboat heading south.
'That's right,' said my brother,' he's probably laying very low in Bintan.'
That was my turf I said.
'That's why the CIA is happy with you, they keep on asking me where haven't you traveled.
Usually, only in the hot spots, I said.
'And that's why the CIA is very happy with you. They love the idea of a middle-aged Australian with bad teeth who dresses badly being their man in Asia.'
Jack knew how to turn it on when he knew there was a big payment at the other end of a mission.
When do you want us over there, I asked.
As soon as possible, said Jack, I could hear giggling in the background, I'm sure he was training up more assassins.
Then the line went dead.
I'd have to break the news to our team.
I'm sure they'd take it well, especially after I told them that there's a Pizza Hut on the island.
And I had an idea where the Malaysian scum bag was hiding.
